Memorial Day Weekend

Lauren, Zoe the dog, Grandma Jane and Josh

We had such a wonderful Memorial Day weekend! We had both sets of grandparents here on Sunday, a cookout with them and the neighbors Sunday night, and Brian's parents, Grandma Jane and Bumpa Larry stayed until Tuesday morning. The kids went to daycare on Tuesday and Lauren was so sad to leave our house knowing that Grandma and Bumpa were still there. Grandma Jane also brought her dog, Zoe. Lauren and Josh were in LOVE with Zoe! Dixie even liked Zoe, too : ) It was a wonderful visit that we had with everyone and it was so nice of Jane and Larry to drive such a long way to see us. We all miss our family in Milwaukee and wish that we could see them more often.

Lauren

Lauren can pump on the swing!! She doesn't need a push at all. For those of you who either don't have kids or haven't experienced the pain that it is to constantly push a three and a half year old on a swing all the while being critiqued on how you are doing it, you cannot fully appreciate the greatness of this feat. To have her go to the swingset and start swinging all on her own is sooooooo wonderful!! And she basically started doing it by herself. My neighbor and I each worked with her teaching her when to bend her knees so she would start getting the hang of it. To not have to hear, "MOOOOOMMMMY, PUUUUUUSH MEEEEEEEE" is such a glorious feeling! Now, I just need to teach Josh how to pump his legs.......

Lauren is getting better at writing her own name, too. Brian drew the lines and she wrote the letters on her chalkboard. That tricky "R" sometimes gives her trouble, as does the "N" which often turns into an "M." But she is working hard (when she wants to) and is so proud of herself when she does write her own name!

Here are the latest Lauren-isms:

"Butterfly's are ridiculous" "Willow trees are special trees" "Gavin (boy at school) likes me all the time" "I need to put that on my birthday list" "That's amaaaaaazing" "We need to be 'sponsible"

Lauren is a wonderful big sister. She takes care of Joshua - even when he doesn't want her to! And Logan is just in love with her. She can make him laugh so hard and he watches her very intently whenever she is around him.

It is so fun to watch her grow : )

the sock stand-off

Josh, our two-year old, and I are involved in a sock stand-off right now. I put his socks on him this morning and he took them off not soon after. Then he wanted to go outside, so instead of putting his socks back on him myself, I decided that he should learn how to do this since he LOVES to take them off. Apparently, he is not a fan of having to put his own socks on and has been throwing a fit about it for the last hour.

Hence, sock stand-off.

Now, I guess I have two choices. I could put his socks on him, but that really doesn't teach him anything except all he has too do is cry and whine long enough and I will do it for him. OR..... since we have a whole hour before we have to be anywhere, I can continue the stand-off.

I'm not sure who it's torturing more, me or him.

Joshua the over-achiever

Josh is really good at being two. In fact, I'd say that he's an over-achiever.

Here is the conversation of late:

Mommy: "Josh, do you want X?"
Josh: "No. Don't want X."
Mommy: "Are you sure you don't want X because mommy is going to take it."
Josh: "Nooooooo. DON'T WANT X."
Mommy: "Okay."
Josh: "I want X! I waaaaaant X! I WAAAAAANT X!!!!"

The last part goes on and on and on.

Over-achiever.

Hopefully someday he'll put that much effort into something like baseball or reading.

Until then.....

The Invisible Mom

It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to be taken to the store. Inside I'm thinking, "Can't you see I'm on the phone?" Obviously not - no one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner because no one can see me at all. I'm invisible: The invisible mom.

Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing more: "Can you fix this?" "Can you tie this?" "Can you open this?" Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock to ask, "What time is it?" I'm a satellite guide to answer, "What number is the Disney Channel?" I'm a car to order, "Right around 5:30, please."

I was certain that these were the hands that once held books, and the eyes that studied history, and the mind that graduated summa cum laude - but now they had disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again. She's going..... she's going.... she's gone!

One night a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a friend from England. Janice had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in. I was sitting there looking around at the others, all put together so well. It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself. I was feeling pretty pathetic when Janice turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package and said, "I brought you this." It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe. I wasn't exactly sure why she'd given it to me until I read her inscription: "To Charlotte, with admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees."

In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would discover what would become for me: four life-changing truths after which I could pattern my work. No one can say who built the great cathedrals. We have no record of their names. These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never see finished. They made great sacrifices and expected no credit. The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything.

A legendary story in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, "Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be covered by the roof? No one will ever see it." And the workman replied, "Because God sees."

I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It was almost as if I heard God whispering to me, "I see you, Charlotte. I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does. No act of kindness you've done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, is too small for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see right now what it will become."

At times, my invisibility feels like an affliction. But it is not a disease that is erasing my life. It is the cure for the disease of my own self-centeredness. It is the antidote to my strong, stubborn pride. I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never be on. The writer of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our lifetime because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to that degree.

When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, "My mom gets up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for three hours and presses all the linens for the table." That would mean I'd built a shrine or a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home. And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, add, "You're gonna love it there."

As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we're doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of Invisible Women.

Happy Mother's Day, Mom!!

Happy Mother's Day to my mom! You are such a wonderful, beautiful mom! Thank you for all the sacrifices you made (and make) for me and for all the time you gave (and give) to me. You have always made me feel as though I was the most important thing in your life and I truly appreciate you. You are also a wonderful grandma! You give your time, your energy, and much of your patience to your grandkids and they love you very much!
I hope to be the kind of mom to my kids that you were and are to me. Thank you for my life : )
I love you!

she wrote her own name!

Lauren wrote her own name! She has had no desire for writing or letters. We have to have a designated time now for practicing letters and it doesn't last long. I had her conference at school and apparently she's the same way at school. So, yesterday she sat down to practice her letters and she finally wrote her very own name for the very first time! Woo-hoo!!

Easter 2009

So, I'm a little late on the Easter pics, but did you really expect to see them right away?!

We had a great time. My parents stayed with us for the weekend, which all of us really liked. After church, my dad went into the front yard and "hid" Easter eggs so the kids could have their own little hunt. The eggs were pretty easy to find and Lauren and Josh LOVED it!

Ode to Dixie Sue

Dixie Sue just turned 5 on Monday, May 4th. It has definately been a wild five years with our sweet and sassy Dixie. All in all, we have a really great dog. She loves the kids - especially when they drop food on the floor for her. She is protective of the kids and of us. When Lauren goes outside to play in our yard, I let Dixie out and Dixie will bark like crazy is someone walks by. She's like an extra babysitter! She wants to be around us all the time, which is a bit annoying when I am trying to get laundry done or supper cooked and she is plastered up against my legs because something scared her. But she is a really good dog. She loves to hunt with Brian. After being declared "gun-shy" and a "dog that will never hunt" by professional trainers, I think Brian has done a really good job training her!

We left on our first overnight since Logan has been born and our neighbors graciously offered to take care of Dixie for us. Dixie turned out to be the enraged teenager that is ticked-off at being left behind and decided to break ALL the rules! She slept in our bed (made a "nest" and messed up all the bedding), she drank from the toilet, and she ate food off the neighbors countertop (sorry about the doughnut, Jake!) What a sassy dog!!!

We haven't watched the movie "Marley and Me." I read the book a long time ago and loved it, but to be honest, we are a little apprehensive about watching the movie because we've heard it's really sad. Dixie is our Marley. She is our naughty dog, but we love her!!

if only...

If only there were more time in the day.......maybe then I wouldn't feel as though I am ALWAYS behind with slim chance of catching up.